Originally aired February 14, 2006.

Foreman: House! You can't do this!
House: If I had a nickel for every time someone said that.

Wilson: This guy's name is Weber, not von Lieberman.
House: I call Weber "von Lieberman." Way eviler.

Cuddy: You induced a migraine headache in a coma patient?
House: Gave him a little headache, similar to the one you're giving me now.
Cuddy: Have you even read an ethical guideline?

Cameron: Could pain medicine cause an orgasm?
House: I wish.

Cameron: His brain is like a waiter that's got too many-
House: Hey! I do the metaphors!