Please click a year for a list of awards.

2005
2006
2007
2008

Originally aired on April 18, 2006.

House: I'm saying "I don't care what they do as long as my life isn't interrupted by pointless conversations like this one."

Cameron: Depriving her of what little sleep she has, that’s torture.
House: So is cutting people with knives. You can totally get away with that if you have a doctor’s coat on.

Cameron: We're withholding information relevant to her decision to risk her life! How is that not an ethical dilemma?
House: It's not medical information.
Cameron: Who cares?
House: The AMA.

House: Great battles kick up a lot of dirt. Obscure the battlefields so the generals can't see what's going on.
Wilson: So, what are your orders, General House?
House: Sound the retreat.

Hannah: I've got the plague?
House: Don't worry, it's treatable. Being a b****, though... nothing we can do about that.

House: We can only hope Cameron learned something from this.
Wilson: Right. Because you’re all about the teaching.
House: Our children are the future.

Cameron: If she talks, if she does the decent thing then you don't get to solve your puzzle, your game's over and you lose.
House: Yeah. I want to save her. I'm morally bankrupt.

Cuddy: (As she is waking up House). You've seen one patient in the last two hours!
House: Complicated case. I'm a night owl, Wilson is an early bird: we're different species.
Cuddy: Move him into his own cage!
House: Who'd clean up the droppings from mine?

Cameron: If we want this to not get in the way of our friendship, I think we both have to apologize and put it behind us.
Foreman: I like you, really. We have a good time working together. But, ten years from now, we're not gonna be hanging out, having dinners. Maybe we'll exchange Christmas cards, say "hi," give a hug if we're at the same conference. We're not friends, we're colleagues. And I don't have anything to apologize for.

Originally aired on April 11, 2006.

Wilson: Have you read Moby Dick?
House: It’s a book?

Wilson: If you're going to mess with me, wouldn't it be more fun to do it in person?
House: (Over cell phone). Yes, it would.

Chase: I'm going to do a biopsy.
House: Forget it - that battle is over. His raising creatine is his kidneys' way of saying "go on without me."

Wilson: Obsession is dangerous.
House: Only if you're on a wooden ship and your obsession is a whale. I think I'm in the clear.

Wilson: You can't use another patient's labs to diagnose Kawasaki disease!
House: Is that like a dare or something?

Originally aired on April 4, 2006.

Dan: (Asking about a coma patient). Is he OK?
House: He's just tired from being in a coma so long.

Foreman: We explained the anaphylaxis.
House: What do you mean we? I did! At least I thought I did. Maybe I didn't. Still it was all me!

Cameron: You had unsafe sex? The whole unsafe thing didn’t tell you something?

Cameron: (Speaking to Chase). Too bad it's not you giving the sample. We'd be done by now.

Chase: So. the boyfriend brought in an allergen and is lying about it.
Cameron: Or the girl snuck out and she's lying about that.
House: Or the parents are lying about the room being clean.
Cuddy: These are your big ideas? Somebody's lying?
House: Hasn't let me down yet.

Chase: We're going to need a semen sample. You can use the bathroom over there.
Dan: Right. Uh, how do I...?
Cameron: Aim and shoot.
(Dan starts to go).
Chase: No thinking about Dr Cameron. We'll know.

Wilson: All right, I'm finding a new place tomorrow.
House: Right, but not tonight.
Wilson: Well, I figure you wanna shave my eyebrows while I'm asleep. I wouldn't wanna deprive you of that last smile.

Cameron: Love is an emotion certain people experience. Similar to happiness. You know, maybe I should give a more relatable example.
House: Oh, snap!

Foreman: (Speaking to Cameron). So, I hear you don't want teenagers having sex. Teen suicide isn't high enough for you?

Foreman: I say we assume House was right about the anaphylaxis.
House: It is tempting.

(Foreman starts to write on the whiteboard. House stops him).
House: Sorry, there's a reason they call it the whiteboard. It's not my rule.
(Everyone looks at each other).
Foreman: OK, we can all stare at each other or we can investigate what caused the heart failure - just the heart failure. You wanna give me that black marker?
(House gives Foreman the black marker).

Chase: Melinda's dying.
House: We're all dying. How fast?

Originally aired on March 28, 2006.

Wilson: (Speaking to House). I'll be out of your hair tomorrow. What's left of it.

House: My god, what's that smell?
Wilson: Stuffed pepper.
House: What's it stuffed with? Vomit?

Wilson: Now, why do you have a season pass to The New Yankee Workshop?
House: It's a complete moron working with power tools. How much more suspenseful can you get?

Cameron: If you ask me, if two people really trust each other, a threesome once every seven years might actually help a marriage.
House: OK, I say we stop the DDX and discuss that comment.

House: Is the ant big and red or small and black?
Foreman: Medium and brown.
House: Halle Berry brown or Beyonce brown?
Cameron: Is there a difference?
House: (Sarcastically). Is there a difference?

Originally aired March 7, 2006.

Wilson: Let's say you're right.
House: You're saying I’m right?
Wilson: No. Let us say it.

Cuddy: He's 66 years old.
House: He told me he was 65. Liar. I'm outta here.

Ronald: I assume House is a great doctor?
Chase: Why would you assume that?
Ronald: Because if you're that big a jerk you’re either great or unemployed.

House: So, I have to wonder what could be more humiliating then someone calling your girlfriend a cow and not being metaphorical?

House: Cheese is the devil's plaything.

Cameron: She's positive for gonorrhea.
House: I think that's the first time those words have been uttered in joy.

Cuddy: Don't you think that's a little manipulative?
House: No, it's hugely manipulative.

Cameron: I thought we were wearing the wrong shoes for cancer.
House: We're wearing the wrong shoes for testicular cancer. They’re perfect for lymphoma. Except Chase's. They're just goofy.

House: Key to a long life: exotic women, boring cheese.

Cameron: We're going to cure death?
House: (Laughs maniacally). I doubt it.